Nick Mitchell aka Norman Gentle Reviews Top Six

Norman Gentle sings his tribute to the beauty of Siobhan Magnus and reviews the Top Six week of American Idol. Got to LOVE him.

American Idol Top 6: How We Missed Tim Urban

The show began with my darling daughter lamenting, “It’s not going to be the same without Timmeh…”. She was right it wasn’t the same but then again it wasn’t any different except Tim Urban is now ‘come back home’ to Texas.

Pulling up caboose role last night, in the Shania Twain (Train) (play on words) night that Ellen Degeneres thought so funny was Lee Dewyze. The guy sang a completely toneless, tuneless and gravelly version of this Shania song; I could not even figure out what the Hell it was until looked it up. Google is my friend. I guess that’s called ‘making it your own’ and his own is NOT the One.
Lee Dewyze sings “You’re the One”

Michael Lynche picked “It Only Hurts when I’m Breathing” and it only hurt when I sat and watched him sing this. Lynche gave an effeminate, greasy-cheese performance complete with stupid facial contortions and over the top melisma served with a side of terrible. Ellen said he was like Luther Van Dross. That must be one of her funnier lines this season. He too makes this song ‘his own’; an unrecognizable, girly wailing fashitto waste of stage.

Casey James sang, “Don’t”, in his words to “show the side of me I haven’t really showed.” He looked gorgeous, but I was hoping for his showing how to sing Shania without a shirt, but THAT wasn’t the side of him he was talking about. We’re getting the entire Casey/Shania performance moment because well, it is my blog.

Now that is a beautiful man. TheDman keeps saying this guy will win it all, but I think (since he doesn’t really watch this show much) he’s pacifying me for bonus points because I think the guy’s a yummy mess.
The judges loved him, dubbed it The Best Casey James Performance Evah! Simon told him he must kiss Shania and I called it shenanigans. Why did Simon wear his Venom (Spiderman reference) shirt last night?
Crystal Bowersox delivered an authentically country sounding, “No One Needs to Know”, and the judge panel decides, you know, to mix it up, to toss her under the bus. Oh the suspense… will she still be safe (big undertone of sarcasm)? She continues that “Magic Carpet Ride” theme with a new rug and gives a drinking-a- cold-Lone-Star moment.
Crystal Bowersox, “No One Needs to Know”

Aaron Kelly gives the show what he does every week, every thing he does sounds the same. “You’ve Got a Way” though finally made me recall who he reminds me of… a young K D Lange. Why haven’t I noticed this before?
Aaron Kelly “You’ve Got a Way”

Siobhan Magnus was The Scream Train that drove the show last night with her dancing, prancey version of “Any Man of Mine”. Simon Cowell was so knocked out he deemed it sounded like she was ‘giving birth’ on stage. Birth to a new VFTW campaign. Siobhan did not disappoint last night.
Siobhan Magnus “Any Man of Mine”

Yee Haw.

Dial Idol has Michael Lynche and Lee in the bottom two, but then again wee Aaron is at number one. I am pulling for either of them to go home. Or Aaron.

The Karaoke Horror Picture Show?

(c/o Myndrunner from VFTW)
Vote for the Worst has a new pick for the honor of being chosen for The Worst. It’s sad that Tim Urban’s now gone, but time to move forward, he’s so last Tuesday anyway. Seems the guy professes no love for the VFTW site anyway, so no love lost on either side.

Now the “notorious” VFTW site is focusing is on Siobhan Magnus, whom, almost presciently, many of us on the site found to be really a near perfect choice, way back in February.

The timing on this seems about right. Entering into the Top Six and with Crystal seemingly all ready crowned The Winner, Lee Dewyze and his boring Dave Matthews impersonations the potentially second place finisher, Casey James with his electric guitar playing, vocals a cross between Huey Lewis and Eddie Veddar and that Jessica Simpson hair possibly taking him to third place. I can’t imagine who or what is voting for teeny weeny Aaron Kelly – perhaps he has a very large familial following.

Big Mike Lynche is currently coming under scrutiny for his alledgedly using his time on this reality karaoke show to draw in ridiculous groupies and cheating on his wife. A caller into the Kiss 106.1 FM radio show wrote,

“I live in Dallas and just heard a caller on KISS FM 106.1 who said she is friends with the contestant rooming with Big Mike. Her friend, got to assume Timmy or Casey, Alex or Todrick since she’s a DFW caller, told her that Big Mike isn’t the family man he touts himself that he constantly brought back groupie chicks to his room. His roommate claims it’s distracting and hard to focus because of Big Mike and his cheating ways.”

Granted this is just ‘heresay’ but where there’s smoke… Big Mike certainly gives out that ‘I’m so full of myself’ sort of vibe. Touting himself as a personal body builder/trainer in the beginning of this season is also proving to be ridiculous – weekly the guy’s girth spills more and more over the top of his pants and his ass increasingly eclipses the Idol stools.

I’ve not liked him since the beginning when he remained at the show while his wife labored and gave birth to their baby alone and continued to milk the child mentions at every opportunity for the sympathy factor for votes.

That leaves us with Siobhan Magnus – from the initial auditions I saw her Worster worth and she’s at the very least unique and interesting. She showed tremendous entertainment potential in the early weeks, but has badly stumbled and fumbled the past several weeks in song selection and stylings of the tunes.

With The Vote for the Worst site backing her I could see her blowing Blow-Hard Mike and Wee Aaron out of the water in the next two weeks. Even Casey, if he doesn’t step up his game just a bit and become less predictable, could get knocked out. James needs another “Jealous Guy” or he’s Dead Contestant Walking soon too, perhaps even before Teeny Aaron or Fat-Roll Mike.

Here’s to enjoying the last several weeks of this show and hoping Siobhan brings the Rocky Horror back soon.
So much potential those early days…

It’s astounding, time is fleeting Madness takes its toll, But listen closely, not for very much longer…

American Idol – Top Seven

Alicia Keys is the guest mentor on American Idol this week. Regarding mentoring, for the most part she simply pointed out the obvious regarding song delivery and looked lovely. Apparently she’s been a big proponent for solving Africa’s HIV issues too, per the show promotion. Theme of the week, “Songs of Inspiration”, naturally, since this is that “Idol Gives Back” week.

Casey James looked gorgeous. I had to relisten to his song as I was initially focused on looking AT him. That said, he did the song sort of like Huey Lewis and The News does Fleetwood Mac. I keep hoping for something crazy but James may not have it in him. He did have his Cougarific fan club in attendance waving their bedazzled and glittery signs.
“Don’t Stop” Casey James

Randy pointed out Casey sounds the same way week after week.
Ellen was not giving the kind love this week, told him he was not great and no one would be talking about his performance.
Kara ranted something about that song he did last week, (“Jealous Guy”) but she still believes in him. Translation – she’d still hit that.
Simon heaves him under the bus calling it ‘zero emotion’ and lazy song choice.

Paint salesman Lee Dewyze is up next and looks like he’s been on a Happy Hour bender with drab brown crumpled shirt and grey tie askew. He babbled with Ryan about his song choice and how he’s not talked to his BFF GokeyGarcia since he left. He selected Simon and Garfunkel’s “The Boxer” and performed it once again in his best Dave Matthews imitation, mumbling in the same styling he always sings in, but he did attempt some facial contortions to assimilate emotional involvement. He ‘la-la-la-la-la-leid’ for what seemed way too long.

Randy was impressed because he’s a BoBo.
Ellen said she thought he was great and said the phrase, ‘better and better’ twelve times.
Kara took way too long to say really nothing, per her usual.
Simon said it was best of night, and only second song in. (What a tool.)

Highlight, besides Lee finally ending his song, Captain Sully, the guy who saved New York from a firey plane crash and many lives, some years back, was in attendance.

Tim Urban did GooGoo Doll’s “Better Days”; I thought he sang it quite well, he brought some palpable emotion; I really liked him. He did not do a copycat version and really, this was one of the least karaoke of the evening. VFTW slammed it as being out of tune, etc. but perhaps my four glasses of merlot helped with the sound… Alicia Keys liked him too, so Hell, good on Timmeh.
Tim Urban “Better Days”

Randy said it was an interesting choice and called it Karaoke said the song ‘laid there’.
Ellen copied Randy, yapped about soup.
Kara – who gives a shit.
Simon, said he’s improved but it was a little bit of a let down.
I call shenanigans on this entire judge panel.
Ryan called him gaspacho (cold fish soup).
(How freaking obvious, this week it’s toss Tim out week.)

Teeny tiny Aaron Kelly sang horrid child molester, R. Kelly’s song, “I Believe”. He was gravelly, karaoke and typical old Idol with over the top big notes, hyper-dramatic. Who is voting for this guy?

Randy, “You picked a giant, giant song, arrangement was funny to me”. Stupid Randy, that IS the way the song is done by any and every one who has ever done it.
Ellen said she did drugs in the ’70’s.
Kara told wee Aaron he flew.
Simon said he’d turn it off the radio in ten seconds then backtracks to call it good. (What a tool.)

Siobhan Magnus brought the Snow White Disney musical in her selection of “When You Believe”. Completing the birdies-should-be-flying-around-her-head vibe – her ensemble complete with 3-D butterflies, her hair looking as if she’d had it rubbed with a balloon before she hit stage.
“When You Believe’ Siobhan Magnus

Randy commended her for the toughest song of the night, then called it “Ok for me”.
Ellen disagreed and said it offered more confirmation as to why she’s there. (You know E likely loves Disney shows.)
Kara is completely baffled, per usual, thinking comes so hard for her. She offered to hang out with Siobhan but would not buy her records, as if that is something that should be considered a good thing.
Simon called it old fashioned and hated the leaves (butterflies) on her outfit. He tossed the “what a shame” diss at her. (What a tool.)

Michael Lynche with jelly rolls spilling over his jeans and thighs the size of Ryan Seacrest’s entire body continued to emit a full of himself ego-maniac vibe. He’s reminding me more and more of Magilla Gorilla.

He picks “Hero” from my favorite superhero movie, “Spiderman” complete with stupid arm gestures and wearing a guitar, occasionally strumming it. I’d like him to fly right out of there.

Randy thought he held his own, worked it out.
Ellen thought it was great.
Kara said it wasn’t her favorite performance, song unrecognizeable then she made this odd, “booop” sound. Thing is. he sang it just like Nickelback. Kara’s an idiot.
Simon says he’ll be back next week. (as likely they all will be)
Spiderman brought to you by Gorilla productions just because:

I love my Spiderman.

Crystal Bowersox sang “People Get Ready” because she’s really grateful for what’s happening in her life so far. She starts out ‘Bo Bice’ accapella with spot light – then goes gospel with back-up singers and piano. I liked her Hookah/bong-pipe mic stand, nice touch. She is without argument the best of the night, proving Simon’s giddy and planted announcement earlier of Lee, made into a Big Fail. Her tears at the end were brilliant.

Randy said he’s been a fan from day one, gives a standing ovation.
Ellen said she’s more beautiful than ever about four times.
Kara contributed she was glad she put the guitar down and said she just ‘schooled’ all the contestants.
Simon loved the tears. Of course. Called her fantastic, different class from the rest.
Her Dad was in attendance looking not unlike Hunter S. Thompson in oversized sunglasses.

So we had Simon Cowell wearing a big ol’ tool belt all night, the rest of the panel giving their ‘unscripted’ comments. Tim Urban delivered a good performance (for me), Casey James looked gorgeous (to me), Siobhan brought the Disney song, Lee was Dave Matthews, Fat Mike will need a wide-angle lens to capture all of his body and his ego next week and Crystal Bowersox won the show.

Odds are no one goes home tonight as it’s a charity special so all the frantic texting, calling will have been for naught.

Under Pressure: Seacrest Coming Out?

Ryan Seacrest may not be ‘coming out’ in the usual way that terminology is used, as in “Hi, I’m not hetero” but he’s certainly coming out of his past-seasons’ slightly more reserved, self. Likely since Paula Abdul’s unconventional, sometimes whacky and erratic, yet oddly endearing behavior is being missed on the show, Ryan seems poised, willing and able to step up and be her replacement.

After last week’s shows the on-line blogs have been buzzing with tales speculating what’s really up with Ryan this year. Is it the fact the show seems headed for derailment, is it Simon Cowell’s impending departure? A combination of the two or something else entirely? Too, Seacrest tossed an insult veiled as a joke at past Idol co-host, Brian Dunkelman, which was out of place and out of the normal character that Seacrest has embraced on the show.

One of the most off the wall moments from last week was Seacrest verbal sparing with guest mentor and last season’s runner up, Adam Lambert. The sticky situation surrounded discussion of Lambert’s ‘famous’ tongue thrusts while singing. Seems the discussion was about talented tongues…

Then while Tim Urban, whom Ryan dubbed “T’Urban” sang “All My Lovin” Seacrest danced in the aisles with another guy… Initially it was believed to be former contestant, Michael Sarver but apparently that was not the case.
“All My Lovin'” Tim Urban

Now I did not see any dancing going on but it is a nice video of Tim Urban providing a more than decent performance.

Apparently too, Seacrest a fan of the T’Urban, having to cop a feel of Timmeh’s fabulous upper arms in a ‘caught on camera’
muscle feel-up.

So, (a.) Is Ryan Seacrest losing his ever loving mind? (b.) Is Seacrest on pharmaceuticals or the magic herbs? (c.) Or is Ryan just so damn bored with this season he’s ‘bringing back the Abdul’ for comedy relief? Is (d.) Seacrest approaching too many careers exhaustion? Or (e.) All of the above. ?

Teflon Tim vs The Double Elimination Monster

This is it Tim Urban. Time to see if that coating of extra thick teflon can carry you through to another week. Time to shine like the sparkle off your brilliantly white teeth. This is the dreaded double elimination week; strategically set up utilizing Mike Lynche as the kingpin to attempt to knock you off American Idol.

This ruse has worked in the past when certain pesky contestants stayed past their welcome in the eyes of the show’s producers. The Idol Gives Back special is looming in the near future and as ridiculous as it sounds, the show may prefer to have Tim gone. I know, I can’t imagine that charitable special without Urban. It’s a complete mistake considering he’s done Christian charitable causes work in the past; we’re talking experience here folks, plus Urban is one of the only contestants bringing some much needed entertainment to this season.

Not that I’m biased, but it would make more sense to see Aaron “Yoda” Kelly, who has evidenced a complete lack of emotion and personality voted off the show, or that goggle wearing guy, Garcia, who seems to be pissed off every episode when the camera zooms in on him. Neither one can claim much more talent promise than Urban who has shown nothing but positivity and class during his struggle-filled tenure on the show. What Tim possesses that those other two contestants lack, definable charm, positive attitude and an incredibly toned and cut set of abs….that should count for something, right? Right.

Vote for the Worst founder and American Idol bullshit spotting guru, Dave Della Terza, was interviewed by AOL Television about the site’s longest running Idol pick. Dave explained what he loves about Tim Urban and what the site participants appreciate about the guy:
Tell us, in your own Vote for the Worst words, what makes Tim Urban so special.

“He just doesn’t seem to care. I mean, he cares, but he doesn’t take it seriously, which is something that we always love in the Vote For the Worst contestants. I mean, when we had Sanjaya coming out with a ponyhawk or singing to the crying girl — we love that stuff. People seem to take ‘American Idol’ so seriously, so when one of the contestants like Norman Gentle isn’t taking it seriously, we love that. The fact that Tim Urban just isn’t taking himself seriously and all the other contestants are getting so upset if they’re on the bottom and he’s just laughing it off — that’s awesome. He clearly is making everyone angry, because he knows he’s on borrowed time. He knows he isn’t supposed to be there, but he’s just having fun with it.”

Each week Dave is surprised and elated at the success of retaining Urban to sing another week. Granted the crowd at Vote for the Worst can’t take all the credit, Tim Urban has a small legion of fans outside the Worster box in the form of teen and tween-age girls as well as the fans he held here in Texas prior to the competition.

Donna Reynolds who has been writing and blogging about American Idol from the beginning of the show (I think) wrote in Syracuse.com:

“In what some are calling the most boring season of ‘American Idol’ ever, there has been one rather compelling element, and that is the continuing survival of Tim Urban in the competition…
But in a season that has been as dull as dishwater (how dull is dishwater, anyway), the excitement generated by Tim’s continuing survival is making this season a little more enjoyable. I urge you to help by voting for Tim this week!”

USA Today has a positive write up following Tim’s Lennon and McCartney week performance.

“Tim brings out the hollowbody electric (and a Beatles hairstyle) for All My Loving, which he gives sort of a Plain White T’s shuffle. Honestly — and I kind of hate to say it — he gets this song inside and out, and he’s doing just the right things with the melody and rhythm, and he’s actually playing to his strengths.”

It’s true, there have been some who have praised Tim but he also has amassed a large contingency of detractors here and abroad. Stuart Heritage of Hecklerspray.com, one of the top voted sites in the UK, (and perhaps the world as he likes to indicate) has taken notice of Tim. Mr. Heritage added his two cents about what he thought of Tim in a piece he put together last week.

“Every second that Tim Urban stays on American Idol feels like an eternity of being kicked in the balls. That’s no exaggeration. It feels like we’ve been waiting for years to see the floppy-haired, perpetually wrongheaded Osmond cyborg get eliminated from American Idol, and it still hasn’t happened yet.”

Tim Urban is going to need all the help he can get THIS week, he’s facing the daunting challenge of beating the dreaded “Double Elimination Week” after the judge’s panel unanimously agreed to save Michael Lynche who, last week, was depicted as receiving the lowest votes. This week viewers will see two people voted off, likely candidates may be Tim Urban, that Katie girl, Aaron Kelly and Goggles Garcia.

Tim’s time on this show has been the classic Underdog story. Initially he was cast aside for past contender, Chris Golightly who was disqualified on an unconfirmed technicallity. The show reinstated Urban but likely did not expect him to progress much farther than that first week (24). Urban has been met with unabashed and harsh criticisms from the judging panel week after week with the exception of this past week. Tim has smiled and thanked the judges no matter what they’ve said to him. Most contestants met with even half the vitriole that Urban has faced have cried and lost confidence. Tim Urban is the epitome of qualities that makes the Underdog champion so likeable, he’s a poster boy for the power of positive thinking.

Tim Urban at The Door, Dallas, Texas (his local band)

Tim Urban, Original song

Tim Urban ‘Teh’ Actor:

“Should I Stay or Should I Go?” The Clash

American Idol: Lennon & McCartney

Scrabbling this out on the fly tonight as manana I’ve got an early plane to catch… There is no mentor tonight but Paul McCartney gives a recorded pep talk. It’s lame and I’m completely disappointed in Sir Paul… is he getting old age addled?

Aaron, apparently has some sort of Yoda thing going on that the rest of us at home don’t understand.

He sings “A Long and Winding Road” without changing the tune up at all and quite sincerely, while of course, adding his country twang. He holds a nice long note at the end.
RandytheBoBo says, hooooh here we go; beautiful tone. Sleepy tune, not changed up. He wanted Aaron does Rascal Flatts does the Beatles.
Ellen, blah, blah.
Kara said but for what you’re trying to do, you have to be great. She wants him to move… of course. Poor kid likely has no moves.
Aaron keeps forgetting to use his mike to talk.
Aaron said he stuck to the arrangement because he did not want to alter a great song.

Simon thought it was too old for Aaron said something about Aaron should havea ‘done some research’ (what?).

Imbecile Kara wanted the cha cha version it seemed as she danced it in her seat saying, ‘tempo, tempo’. Idiot.

I thought wee Aaron did a decent yet boring job. The show obviously wants him gone.

These judges make absolutely no sense. I mean this song changed up? No, I don’t think so. Idiots.

Katie Stevens is next, wearing an “I Dream of Jeannie” hairdo. Apparently she wants her prospective dates to show their love by their phone bills. Way to whore out at the tender age of 17, gal. It seems Katie can dance. Woo hoo.

Siobhan’s comments for the other contestants continue to aide her seemingly shy a few crayons in the box of sixteen.

Katie sung “Let It Be” sung exactly like the original version while staring meaningfully(lessly) into the camera. Completely motionless. Of course she stands motionless, I mean right after the viewers were treated to the other contestant’s telling that ‘interesting’ fact that she can dance.
RandytheBoBo Best vocals ever. (Of course since Katie does not change it up at all it’s brilliant.)
Ellen said she changed it up enough… no way to be there (B3) this week.
Kara told her she’s blossoming twice. Like a flower. (Or… ragweed. )
Simon said when in B3 consistently, something wrong. Tonight you got it right. He calls her version ‘country’.

Simon and Kara verbally spar; he tells her she’s out of tune while she screeches the lyrics of “Let It Be”. She was. I did love Simon’s look of utter disdain looking at Kara.

I wasn’t enthralled with Katie.

Andrew Garcia is apparently BFF with Lee. He still wears his Wayne Newton pompadour. He sings “Can’t Buy Me Love” bringing the acoustic guitar along for the strumming. He’s going for energetic but I’m not digging it.
RandytheBoBo corny, pop, all in all okay.
Ellen, first of all you can buy love. Perfect song choice. I loved it.
Kara, I wanna love it I do but I just don’t know if you did anything new.
Her sequined tank top is almost blinding me. Talk about Sparkle Cow.
Simon, goes the Wedding Singer comparison, band overwhelming him and arrangement old-fashioned and irrelevant.

Michael Lynche is compared to the Incredible Hulk by Katie. Casey complains about his snoring. Mike has some sort of odd Ninja screech when greeting people. Gah.

He choses “Eleanor Rigby” then alters it giving it a different beat, soulful treatment. Even TheD likes him. His use of strings and the composition works. His vocals sound quite good.
RandytheBoBo: the parts that worked is great but not all of it worked.

(I say “what”?)

Ellen, you can do anything, you handle everything well. I thought it was incredible, I loved it.
Kara, I thought that was fire.

(TheD is hating her so much said the judging totally detracting from the bit of talent on this year.)

Simon, I did not love it as much as the other three. Musical performance, I don’t think it made you contemporary at all. Backwards step.

(Translation… we need not keep obviously frothing over Big Mike.)

Crystal Bowersox, nicknamed MamaSox because she’s a mom and a nurturing type of individual, according to the others. She’s sick again, seems the Idol camp constantly coming down with something. Crystal selects, “Come Together”, changes it up giving it her best Janis Joplin treatment. A guy with some sort of Australian tuba, a digerydu/digerydoo (?) accompanies her, which is interesting by itself. She gets the nice orange glow light treatment.

The crowd goes wild, RandytheBoBo said not her best but was good.
Ellen, how do you improve on a L and M song? (Meanwhile with Aaron they were at him for not changing a L and M song.)
Kara said she was like a slinky…
Simon, that’s a song, performance I could hear on the radio. It just worked. Being true to yourself.

Crystal hugs Ernie the digerydoo player endearing herself to the masses.

VFTW star, Tim Urban. It seems he really is always smiling. Tim totally hams it up making the folks at VFTW proud, I’d think. He pulls out his electric guitar, playing a ES335. Delivered like Disney boy, Zack Efron would and not completely horrible.
RandytheBoBo Yo Tim, Tim, Tim you’re in your own category. So rating it as a “Tim” performance. Good Tim Performance.
Ellen, second best after “Halleluiah” Paul McCartney look going on and all the girls love you.
Kara, have guitar and feels true. You’re to be commended.
Apparently the media heat affecting the judges.
Simon, I thought you did really well with that song. Sounds very current. Take the criticism like a man.

So are they somehow thinking about kicking Timmeh to the curb? We shall see.
Vote for Timmeh, 1-866-436-5706

Casey James is our playboy. He’s so handsome, they’ve come up with names for him for the ladies, Fabio one of them. Casey has a big laugh that some have referred to him as “Goldilockes”. He does the tune, “Jealous Guy” dressed like John Travolta. Accompanied with acoustic guitar and cello. Decent. In full goat vibratto. Hello Eddie Vedder. He imparts some soul into the song….

I really, really loved it.

RandytheBoBo, I love it, I love it. (He wants to birth his baby.)
Ellen, felt like you were singing it to someone. Best performance to date.
Kara I saw a vulnerability, depth and range. I think you can do more, still. (She’s creaming herself, I think I saw drool.)
Simon, Goldilockes? Best of the night so far. Emotional, very, very impressed with you tonight.

I love him.

Siobhan Magnus the others talk about her weirdness. No big new news. “Across the Universe” in a Fairy Princess outfit. New wig. Floofy. Smiling through the song. Like a musical, where are the dancing children? She gets cool speckled light treatment. Very reined in performance.
RandytheBobo said, I wonder every week – no one screams artist more than you. Tender side. Falsetto high note. A little sleepy. I love your artistry in you.
Ellen, big fan of those who march to beat of different drum. I loved it.
Kara, purely singing, you hit the notes, knew where you are going. She thought it was too slow.
(She knows nothing about artistry.)
Simon, what were you connecting to in that song? I think if someone heard you the first time be confused.

Siobhan said it was the lyrics, her baby sisters, nothing will change. Tears were brilliant.

Then the audience heckler (Earl loves her) gets a moment. Quite random. And a stalker is born…

Lee Dewyze and Andrew GokeyGarcia apparently have a love match going on. Lee does “Hey Jude” in the vein of Dave Matthews or John Meyer only not nearly as good. Our lead singer in our little cover band is better than Lee. I think it’s boring. TheDman called it ‘anticlimatic’ after Siobhan. My kid sitting next to me said, the best thing is the bag pipe guy. I agreed.
RandytheBoBo said, (I dunno, he was a puddle of babble.)
Ellen, confidence – even when that guy got separated from his parade. ( finally E makes a funny )
Kara it’s hot.
(I hate her.)
Simon, I don’t know what you guys are drinking in the house…. instrumentations; it was like he turned up on the wrong show…

(And it did not work.)

Summation, I think the show wants Aaron out… he should be the one to leave this week. Bottom three, Aaron, Tim and Andrew…

That said, my faves of the night, Teflon Timmeh and gorgeous Casey James. Yep.

American Idol: Heroes are Coated in Teflon

I had to rewatch the show again this morning because I was so hysterically transfixed last night from the a.)Clash of the Titans ludicrous opening and b.) VFTW Teflon Tim Urban continuing to smile his charming and lovely grin in the face of adversity.

Seriously talk about product placement and paying the bills, utilizing the upcoming 3-D spectacular (that I will have to see) as a comparison to this season’s contestants on American Idol a study in opposites. Considering this season’s offering of contestants, most of whom lack stage appeal, not much going on in the way of anything of Titan caliber. Granted there are a few contestants that exhibit singing capability and talent but there is nothing “Titan”-like in this season with the exception of Teflon Tim Urban perhaps. It was entertaining to see Simon Cowell being compared to the Kracken. Hey, I’ve got to find entertainment where I can with this season.

Ruben Studdard was there to promote he and Clay Aiken’s upcoming tour for anyone who still remembers them from seven years back. He’s either been Jenny Craig’ed or the suit was just two sizes too large.

The requisite weekly Ford commercial had the contestants “Kung Foo Fighting” with Casey James walking coolly among the kicking, dancing ‘kung foo’ fighters. James then drives off knocking Big Mike Lynche’s ninja guy out of the way. On VFTW this was found ironic considering James’ past history with DUI’s. Clueless go they, the show’s producers.

The contestants are unfortunately provided time to talk about their time on the show and what they’re planning or learning as the weeks progress. Lee Dewyze and Casey James, neither guy could string two words together to create any sort of communicable coherent thoughts much less muster up an entire sentence. “Cupcake”, 16- year old Aaron was embarrassed beyond what should be proper considering he’s a minor, to be caught between Ryan and Simon’s homoerotic banter. To top that awkward sharing, RandytheBobo tries to explain “love” to Cupcake as something akin to how he might feel toward his parents only ‘twisted’. Siobhan’s shot at communication basically amounted to explaining that she IS a human being. Katie seemed to be confident that she’s perfectly safe. I think that Ryan is truly underestimated in the difficulty of his job in making this show interesting. He attempts to engage the judges, but sadly they are not much more verbose than the contestants.

Teen sensation, Justin Beiber is in attendance to show his support for Usher, whom, apparently has been his ‘mentor’ in the music industry. With auto-tuner in full evidence and overused back lighting Usher comes down the Idol steps performing one of the most idiotic songs I’ve ever heard. I think this sort of music and the mindset that thinks this is great entertainment the weapon being utilized in the dumbing down of humanity as a whole. The lyrics, “baby how you do dat make a grown man cry… sexy.. O O O” .

After enduring Usher and Will.I.Am’s turd of a performance viewers were treated again to the eliminations. Didi Benami gets up and babbles incoherently, batting her lashes at Ryan. She gets introduced to the bottom three stools. Michael Lynche who is continuously being mistaken as a muscle bound guy who really is quite fat is called “Tiny Mike” by Ellen. He then gets the teaser of almost walking to the stools, then lifts Ryan end over ass for messing with him. Ryan is quite breathless – I think they both enjoyed that special moment.

Crystal of course was safe, no need to talk about her further. Then it’s Teflon Tim’s turn to be confronted by the judges. Kara decides it’s her role to address Tim and his attitude largely due to his smiling and laughing at her critique of him the night before.

Apparently the only thing Kara can consider is Teflon Tim is too mentally deficient to comprehend what is being said to him. Kara winds up appearing to be the mentally deficient one as she’s at a loss for words following Tim’s response.

This is the main factor that is making me love this guy more as the weeks progress; his ability to keep smiling no matter how badly the judges try to knock it off his face. Teflon Tim’s response to Kara’s ill-mannered question, while maintaining a smile, “I get what you’re saying, every time I step onto that stage, I know it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. And why spoil a great opportunity like that by getting depressed?”

This scenario displayed a few things about the show. One, Tim Urban is seemingly one of the only contestants able to string words together to formulate complete and coherent sentences, two, Tim Urban completely comprehends and embraces the power of positive thought, and three, if it wasn’t obvious before, the judges roles are to manipulate and coerce the viewing audience and four, Kara Dioguardi completely is underestimating this guy.

Katie goes back to the contestant herd leaving Didi and Teflon Tim. We’re put on hold as P.Diddy Dirty Money is up next. Yep. That was his name introduction. The dreaded reappearance of the autotuner looms nigh. Little did I know that this next performance would nearly put me into a seizure. Diddy or whatever the hell his name is rips off Kanye West’s “Good Morning” tune with autotuner full out, inappropriate use of sunglasses, prancing about in steam and flashing lights. Some sort of odd statement must have been being made with almost everyone dressed in white except this thick Elvira of a gal wearing all black that he danced with – then it hits. Strobe lights. This beat the Usher tune for complete ridiculousness. Lyrics, “you know, you know, you know… hello good morning”. I must say Kanye West’s Good Morning tune much, much better, but that’s not a ringing endorsement.

After my ears stopped bleeding and my eyes recovered the final results began. Shocker for most people watching, Didi Benami is evicted from the show. She picks “Rhiannon” as it was one of her better performances to sing for the save. She has an interesting sounding voice but she’s a complete niche artist. Her type of vocals don’t translate well into every genre. While she’s singing it’s obvious the judges are not even really talking about her.

So Vote for the Worst darling and one of the only contestants besides Sanjaya Malakar that has consistently smiled in the face of adversity carries on to sing another week. Texas’ own, Teflon Tim Urban, the apparent object of many a tween girl’s affection (think Justin Beiber) slides safely back to the seats to remain to compete next week making him the longest running VFTW pick in the history of that website. One more thing, perhaps Tim Urban not the most technically proficient singer to ever show up on the American Idol stage but he’s certainly one of the most likeable, possibly most intelligent contestants in my recollection.

Tim Urban, original song:

So with that, off and away, Texan Teflon Tim Urban, my hope is that you slide into the Lennon McCartney week to once again succeed with your smiling, positive attitude.